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Love the Airport/Hate the Airport

I just love the airport. The funniest people get on airplanes. Some dress up like they are going to the Prom, while others look like they just got out of bed. I can sit here for hours and look at everyone.

Things I hate about flying are people getting through TSA check points. Let's get a few things cleared up.

1. Take your shoes off first.
2. Take all of the Sh$% out of your pockets first.
3. You do not need to take everything on the plane with you, that is why airlines have check bags.
4. Be ready for it, I hate when people get to the front of the line and then start getting ready and take for $%$%^$$%^^%$%% ever to go through. Those of us that fly a lot just want to slap you stupid, oh yah, you are already there.
5. When getting on the plane, you can not fit a 6 cubic foot square bag into a 3 cubic foot round storage compartment. Do not move my stuff, don't look at me for help because you are a dumb ass. My furry little butt just does not care.
6. People that want to talk on the plane. I don't care about your life story, I want to sleep. Don't invade my space, if you are fatter than me, buy 2 seats and leave me alone.

Side note, question? As I'm sitting at the airport right now working on free internet, what is with these "ugg" boots? At least that's what I think they are called. Young lady somewhere around mid 20s, dressed nice with these ugly white furry boots. I have permanent furry boots, does that mean I'm in style?

7. If you don't know what you are doing, stay out of the way and learn, ask questions, but don't and I mean don't hold me up just because you think the airline should change things just to accommodate your fat ass.

8. Peanut pushers are not slaves. Treat them with respect and be nice. (peanut pushers=Flight Attendants)

9. And last for this post, Keep you kids on a short chain. Kids running around like the airport is a flipping play ground is wrong. I have duct tape and am not afraid to use it.

When you fly more than 50,000 mile a year you kind of get punchey over some things. So if you see a grumpy Woodchuck at the airport, tread softly.

Comments

Anonymous said…
oh, he's dangerous with two hours to kill and wireless access . . .
Travel said…
Remember to be nice to the rental car agents, I bet that Suzuki Swift is still waiting for someone who is not nice.

At one airport the TSC supervisor would move anyone not ready for screening to the back of the line.

DG
Anonymous said…
AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!!! Great post and so on the money. It never ceases to amaze...after watching 15 people in front of them remove shoes, coats, pocket contents, there are those that reach the front and still have no grasp of concept...and if I appear less than enthusiastic about sharing "what I do for a living" with you when you ask please take that as a hint that the flight long conversation you have in mind might not be good idea! Bravo!

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